Knowledge

Knowledge

A scientific convention was held at a lakeside resort. After the first day's proceedings, a mathematician, a physicist, an astronomer and a molecular biologist hired a boatman to row them around on the lake.

As they sat in the boat, they discussed string theory, bubble universes, the Gaea Hypothesis and other abstruse topics. The biologist noticed the boatman looking at them from the corner of his eyes. He asked him, "What do you think of these ideas?" The boatman replied, "I didn't understand any of it." The astronomer asked him how far he had studied. He told them he couldn't even read. "I hate to say it," said the physicist, "but you seem to have wasted a good part of your life." The boatman remained silent.

By now they were out in the middle of the lake, far from shore. A sudden storm whipped up. The waves started churning and heaving. All of a sudden, the boat flipped over. The boatman started swimming for shore. The scientists cried out, "Help! We can't swim!" The boatman called back, "I hate to say it, but you seem to have wasted your whole lives."

Funny Ringtone

The Obedient Wife

There was a man who had worked all his life, had saved all of his money, and was a real "miser" when it came to his money.

Just before he died, he said to his wife..."When I die, I want you to take all my money and put it in the casket with me. I want to  take my money to the afterlife with me."
 
And so he got his wife to promise him, with all of her heart, that when he died, she would put  all of the money into the casket with him.

Well, he died. He was stretched out in the casket, his wife was sitting there - dressed in black, and her friend was sitting next to her.  When they finished the ceremony, and just before the undertakers got ready to close the casket, the wife said,
 
"Wait just a moment!"
She had a small metal box with her; she came over with the box  and put  it in the casket. Then the undertakers locked the casket down and they rolled it away. So her friend said,
 
"Girl, I know you were not fool enough to put all that money in there with your husband."

 
The loyal wife replied, "Listen, I cannot go back on my word. I promised him that I was going to put that money into the casket with him."
 

You mean to tell me you put that money in the casket   with him!?!?!?"

"I sure did," said the wife. "I got it all together, put it into my account, and wrote him a cheque... If he can cash it, then he can spend it."