Friday, November 30, 2007
Tuesday, November 27, 2007
Men And Women
1. Tests have shown that women rate 3% higher in general intelligence than men, although their brain size is smaller. Most women act dumb to make their mates look good.
2. Women are walking radar detectors, that is why men have difficulty lying to women. Their brains have the ability to integrate and decipher verbal, visual and other signals of body language. Hence women will always be safe when faking an orgasm.
3. Women want lots of sex with the man she loves. Men just want lots of sex.
4. When men flirt, they will lower their pitch of voice. Women will raise theirs.
5. Women talk and think aloud while men do them silently. As a result, men think women talk too much and are nags.
6. Women talk about their problems as a way of relieving stress. She wants to be heard, not fixed by being offered advice and solutions.
7. Speech and words are not a specific brain skill for men. They find it hard to express themselves. That's why they often choose greeting cards with plenty of words inside. That way, there's less space for them to write.
8. Women leave men, not because they are unhappy with what he can provide,but because they are emotionally unfulfilled.
9. Women uses an average of 20,000 communication words, sounds, and gestures a day. Men only use about 7,000.
10. So if a woman is talking to you a lot, she likes you. But if she's not talking, you're in trouble.
11. Men are more thick-skined than women. Literally. Which explains why women have more wrinkles than men. Boys lose their sensitivity to touch by the time they reach puberty. So where does all that sensitivity go? It all goes to just one area !
12. If a woman is unhappy in her relationship, she can't concentrate on her work. If a man is unhappy at work, he can't focus on his relationship.
13. Men can only do one thing at a time. When they stop their car to read a street directory, they have to turn down the radio. Women's brains are configured for multi-tasking performance. They can talk on the phone, watch the TV and cook at the same time.
14. Most men get a brain hemorrhage after 20 minutes of clothes shopping.
15. When it comes to sex, women need a reason; men need a place.
16. 15% to 20% of men have feminised brains. About 10% of women have masculinised brains. So there are more gays than lesbians in the world.
17. Most women prefer sex with the lights off because they can't bear to see a man enjoying himself. Men like the lights on - so they can get the woman's name right.
2. Women are walking radar detectors, that is why men have difficulty lying to women. Their brains have the ability to integrate and decipher verbal, visual and other signals of body language. Hence women will always be safe when faking an orgasm.
3. Women want lots of sex with the man she loves. Men just want lots of sex.
4. When men flirt, they will lower their pitch of voice. Women will raise theirs.
5. Women talk and think aloud while men do them silently. As a result, men think women talk too much and are nags.
6. Women talk about their problems as a way of relieving stress. She wants to be heard, not fixed by being offered advice and solutions.
7. Speech and words are not a specific brain skill for men. They find it hard to express themselves. That's why they often choose greeting cards with plenty of words inside. That way, there's less space for them to write.
8. Women leave men, not because they are unhappy with what he can provide,but because they are emotionally unfulfilled.
9. Women uses an average of 20,000 communication words, sounds, and gestures a day. Men only use about 7,000.
10. So if a woman is talking to you a lot, she likes you. But if she's not talking, you're in trouble.
11. Men are more thick-skined than women. Literally. Which explains why women have more wrinkles than men. Boys lose their sensitivity to touch by the time they reach puberty. So where does all that sensitivity go? It all goes to just one area !
12. If a woman is unhappy in her relationship, she can't concentrate on her work. If a man is unhappy at work, he can't focus on his relationship.
13. Men can only do one thing at a time. When they stop their car to read a street directory, they have to turn down the radio. Women's brains are configured for multi-tasking performance. They can talk on the phone, watch the TV and cook at the same time.
14. Most men get a brain hemorrhage after 20 minutes of clothes shopping.
15. When it comes to sex, women need a reason; men need a place.
16. 15% to 20% of men have feminised brains. About 10% of women have masculinised brains. So there are more gays than lesbians in the world.
17. Most women prefer sex with the lights off because they can't bear to see a man enjoying himself. Men like the lights on - so they can get the woman's name right.
Thursday, November 22, 2007
Tuesday, November 20, 2007
Monday, November 19, 2007
Friday, November 16, 2007
Orang Pompuan
Suatu hari, seorang polis trafik bermotosikal ternampak sebuah kereta yang tidak berhenti pada lampu merah dan dipandu agak laju. Maka anggota polis berkenaan pun mengejar kereta berkenaan sambil membunyikan siren. Lama juga pengejaran berkenaan sehinggakan polis berkenaan "flashing" lampunya pun kereta berkenaan masih tidak berhenti.
Kerana tak tahan sabar lagi, polis berkenaan memintas kereta berkenaan dan berjaya memberhentikannya. Apabila kereta dihampiri, didapati pemandunya ialah seorang wanita.
Polis itu bertanya, "Puan..."
Wanita itu memintas, "Nama saya Datin Markonaz..."
"OK... Datin... Datin ni memandu tak tengok cermin pandang belakang ke?"
"Kenapa? I punya make-up comot ke?"
Kerana tak tahan sabar lagi, polis berkenaan memintas kereta berkenaan dan berjaya memberhentikannya. Apabila kereta dihampiri, didapati pemandunya ialah seorang wanita.
Polis itu bertanya, "Puan..."
Wanita itu memintas, "Nama saya Datin Markonaz..."
"OK... Datin... Datin ni memandu tak tengok cermin pandang belakang ke?"
"Kenapa? I punya make-up comot ke?"
Thursday, November 15, 2007
Cerita Doktor Pakar
Pada suatu hari, seorang doktor pakar jantung meninggal dunia. Untuk mengenang jasanya, keluarganya sepakat untuk membuatkan sebuah tugu peringatan dikuburnya berbentuk jantung. Upacara pengkebumian pun berjalan dengan lancar.
Satu bulan kemudian, seorang doktor pakar mata pula meninggal dunia. Seperti yang sudah?, ahli keluarganya sepakat untuk membina sebuah tugu berbentuk mata dikuburnya bagi mengenang jasa beliau. Upacara pengkebumiaan beliau juga berjalan dengan lancar.
Setelah selesai, para hadirin berangkat pulang, hanya tinggal seorang saja yang masih merenung sendirian di pinggir makam si doktor itu. Salah seorang doktor yang lain melihatnya dan segera menghampirinya. "Sudahlah, yang berlalu biarlah berlalu. Tak usah engkau fikirkan lagi " kata si doktor.
"Saya tidak tahu apa yang harus saya katakan kepadamu," kata lelaki itu.
"Mengapa pula, mana tahu mungkin saya dapat membantu" jawab si doktor itu.
"Saya sedang memikirkan bagaimana pula upacara pengkebumian saya nanti" kata lelaki itu.
"Mengapa pula ?" tanya doktor tersebut. "Saya seorang doktor pakar penyakit kelamin" jawap lelaki itu sugul...
Satu bulan kemudian, seorang doktor pakar mata pula meninggal dunia. Seperti yang sudah?, ahli keluarganya sepakat untuk membina sebuah tugu berbentuk mata dikuburnya bagi mengenang jasa beliau. Upacara pengkebumiaan beliau juga berjalan dengan lancar.
Setelah selesai, para hadirin berangkat pulang, hanya tinggal seorang saja yang masih merenung sendirian di pinggir makam si doktor itu. Salah seorang doktor yang lain melihatnya dan segera menghampirinya. "Sudahlah, yang berlalu biarlah berlalu. Tak usah engkau fikirkan lagi " kata si doktor.
"Saya tidak tahu apa yang harus saya katakan kepadamu," kata lelaki itu.
"Mengapa pula, mana tahu mungkin saya dapat membantu" jawab si doktor itu.
"Saya sedang memikirkan bagaimana pula upacara pengkebumian saya nanti" kata lelaki itu.
"Mengapa pula ?" tanya doktor tersebut. "Saya seorang doktor pakar penyakit kelamin" jawap lelaki itu sugul...
Friday, November 9, 2007
Nama-nama Jepun
1. Yg pemarah - KEJI CACIMAKI
2. Yg tak suka brg mahal - SATO SUKAMURA
3. Yg bisu - KITA TADASUARA
4. Yg suka makan tose - NANACHI HITOSE
5. Yg suka lagu blues - APO NADIKATO
6. Yg suka belajar - ASIKO ULANGKAJI
7. Yg kerap bikin ribut - WAKASI HURUHARA
8. Yg masih bujang - MATIMATI TAMOKASI
Usahawan Prepaid
2. Yg tak suka brg mahal - SATO SUKAMURA
3. Yg bisu - KITA TADASUARA
4. Yg suka makan tose - NANACHI HITOSE
5. Yg suka lagu blues - APO NADIKATO
6. Yg suka belajar - ASIKO ULANGKAJI
7. Yg kerap bikin ribut - WAKASI HURUHARA
8. Yg masih bujang - MATIMATI TAMOKASI
Usahawan Prepaid
Wednesday, November 7, 2007
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